Jul 28, 2009

Good Relationship (s) *Vital*

In resolving conflict using this approach, you follow these rules:
Make sure that good relationships are the first priority:
As far as possible, make sure that you treat the other calmly and that you try to build mutual respect.
Do your best to be courteous to one-another and remain constructive under pressure;
Keep people and problems separate:
Recognize that in many cases the other person is not just "being difficult" – real and valid differences can lie behind conflictive positions.
By separating the problem from the person, real issues can be debated without damaging working relationships;
Pay attention to the interests that are being presented:
By listening carefully you'll most-likely understand why the person is adopting his or her position;
Listen first;
talk second:
To solve a problem effectively you have to understand where the other person is coming from before defending your own position;
Set out the “Facts”:
Agree and establish the objective, observable elements that will have an impact on the decision; and
MindTools.com
Explore options together: Be open to the idea that a third position may exist, and that you can get to this idea jointly.

Jul 16, 2009

YOU...got me...Walking on the Moon!

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.
Small
people always do that,
but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
~Mark Twain

Let each know that for each the body, mind and soul have been freed to fulfil themselves.
~Nelson Mandela
We look forward to the time when the Power of Love will replace the Love of Power. Then will our world know the blessings of peace.
~William Ewart Gladstone

Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more.

If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.

~Oprah Winfrey




Jul 13, 2009

How to Repel Negative Energy

Everything is made of energy and that even includes us.
Our energy affects other people and their energy affects us as well.
This is apparent when we are around certain people who always make us feel happy or others who make us feel uncomfortable.
You've probably walked into a room where you could just feel the negative energy. Strong negative energy fields can sap your own energy leaving you feeling drained. It is important to learn how to protect yourself by keeping negative energy at bay.
Step 1
Visualize being surrounded by a bubble of positive energy. Whenever you feel negative energy imagine the bubble surrounding you and protecting you from the negative energy. The negative energy cannot penetrate the bubble therefore it cannot affect you. All negative energy bounces off the bubble and returns to its source. Practice this exercise until you feel comfortable forming the bubble to repel negative energy.
Step 2
Carry citrine to repel negative energy. Citrine is a yellowish colored gemstone that dispels negativity. Many gemstones can become imbued with both negative and positive energies that they come in contact with but citrine does not hold negative energy and actually works to remove negative energy. Carry a piece of citrine in your pocket or wear a piece of citrine jewelry. Place several pieces of citrine around your home to dispel negative energy.
Step 3
Use candles to dispel negative energy in the home. Everything has an energy of its own that can both affect and be affected by the energy of others. Burn candles to create a calm relaxing atmosphere. Choose candle colors such as pink which represents love, light blue which represents relaxation and healing as well as white which represents purity and cleansing.
Step 4
Burn incense to repel negative energy. Burning incense can affect the energies around us. Throughout history many cultures have utilized the ritual of burning incense to aid prayers on their way to heaven, cleanse homes, clear negative energies and more. People often use certain scents such as sandalwood or sage to remove negative energies but you can use any scent that you feel comfortable with. Use the incense anywhere you feel negative energy.
Step 5
Visualize your aura as a bright white light surrounding you. The aura is the electromagnetic field that surrounds all beings. Visualize your aura emanating far from your body and expanding to protect you and repel all negative energy from entering your energy field. Practice this exercise until you feel comfortable doing it when
needed.

Jul 10, 2009

Nothing more IMPORTANT!


When a person really
desires something, all the universe conspires to help that
person realize his dream
. ~Paulo Coelho
It is not how much we do, but how

much love we put in the doing. It is not how much we give, but how much love we put into the giving. Mother Theresa



Do more than belong: participate.
Do more than care: help. Do more than believe: practice. Do more than be fair: be kind. Do more than forgive: forget. Do more than dream: work. ~William Arthur Ward
There are those who work all day.

Those who dream all day. And those who spend an hour dreaming before setting to work to fulfill those dreams.
Go into the third category because there’s virtually no competition.
~Steven J Ross

Jul 6, 2009



Finding Balance

Owning You!
By Rande Bynum, staff writer

Sometimes, you can spend so much time trying to look good and trying to fit in, you forget to feed your inner self.
Flip the Script
Are you spending hours in the mall searching for those perfect shoes and then the perfect matching bag? Or is makeup your poison? Would a search warrant reveal at least 10 new lip glosses in your bedroom? The media sends messages that the latest and the hottest equal happiness. Try flipping the script once in a while. What used to make you happy back in the day? Was it that new box of crayons on the first day of school or was it playing tag in the local playground? Rediscover the artist or athlete in you.

Introduce yourself to your inner poet or the stand-up comedian you are hiding.


Embrace the Simple Pleasures




Do you have a passion that you put aside because you thought it may not be the coolest?
Or you feel you don't have time for such silliness? Why not try to find it again? Take inventory and find out what's really important. Surprise! It's not having the latest lip gloss. In a journal or notebook write down the things that make you smile, laugh—feel good.
Self Day—Your Day of the Week
You are so busy during the week with "important stuff" like school, work, and friends; you don't have time to be an amateur magician or a bowling champion. Pick a day or part of a day as your "self day." On this day do the things that make you smile—inside. If you are seeking the artist in you, spend the day being inspired in a museum or checking out the latest in anime. If there is an inner "Emeril" waiting to get out, spend the afternoon preparing a special meal for your friends or family. It could be a poetry hour or a dance night or a marathon club.
Whatever it is that's itching to get out, schedule time to let it come out and play.
In a journal write down the one thing you would do if you had more time. See if you can schedule time to do that one thing on your "self day."
Caution: Lanes Merging
You might share different personas or parts of yourself on different occasions. Perhaps you have a school persona, a home persona, a soccer team captain persona, or maybe a big sister persona. In a journal write down what qualities you like most about yourself in different situations and how can you bring them all together to become the BEST YOU.
Discover Your Style
Adapted from
STUDIO 2B Focus: uniquely ME! Inside and Out

Jun 23, 2009

Hidden Health Secrets of Lemons


Did you know the Ancient Egyptians believed that eating lemons and drinking lemon juice was an effective protection against a variety of poisons, and that recent research has confirmed this belief?
There are many health benefits of lemons that have been known for centuries. The two biggest are lemons’ strong antibacterial, antiviral, and immune-boosting powers and their use as a weight loss aid because lemon juice is a digestive aid and liver cleanser. Lemons contain many substances--notably citric acid, calcium, magnesium, vitamin C, bioflavonoids, pectin, and limonene--that promote immunity and fight infection.

These are well-known health facts about lemons. But there’s so much more to this little yellow fruit. Whether you use them in the form of juice, teas, drinks, dressing, poultices or in the bath, take advantage of lemons’ natural healing power.

Abolish Acne
Lemon contains citric acid, which can be effective in treating acne. The vitamin C found in citrus fruits is vital for that healthy glowing skin while its alkaline nature kills some types of bacteria known to cause acne. In addition to drinking lemon juice with water first thing in the morning, here are some suggestions on how to prepare a homemade acne treatment using lemon:
With your finger or a cotton ball, apply fresh lemon juice on acne and leave it overnight.
Wash with water the following morning.
There may be an uncomfortable sensation of burning at first, but it will soon disappear.
Mix one part of freshly squeezed lemon juice with an equal part of rose or honey water.
Put the mixture on affected areas for at least half an hour.
Wash it afterwards with water.
This application should be repeated twice daily, ideally in the morning and the evening.
Abandon Your Anxiety
Research has shown that lemon balm has a calming effect and therefore may be able to help remove fatigue, exhaustion, dizziness, anxiety, nervousness, and tension.
It is also believed that inhaling lemon oil helps in increasing concentration and alertness.
It can therefore be used as a room freshener in offices to increase the efficiency of the employees.
If you’re feeling tense sprinkle a few drops of lemon balm essential oil (Melissa officinalis) on a handkerchief to inhale
Canker Sore, No More
The proven antibacterial and antiviral properties of lemons can accelerate the healing process in the case of cankers.
Mix the juice of freshly squeezed lemon into a glass of lukewarm water and rinse your mouth with this solution;
do this three times a day.
There may be a burning sensation when the lemon juice comes into contact with the canker, however, the more frequently you use it, the less burning there will be.
Leave the Fever
Chills and fevers may be due to a variety of causes, but the lemon is always a helpful remedy. Here is a method that can ease symptoms: add the juice of 1 lemon to a cup of hot water with honey and drink at once, then every 2 hours until the fever or chill subsides .
Erase Eczema
If you suffer from skin infection such as eczema, a lemon wrap may offer relief.
Add 8 drops of lemon essential oil to 1 cup (250ml) lukewarm water and 1 tablespoon (15ml) of liquid honey.
Honey also has anti-inflammatory effect and strengthens the healing power of lemon.
Soak a linen cloth in the liquid, squeeze out the excess, and gently place the cloth on the affected area for 15 minutes, 2 to 3 times a day.
Not only will this ease the infection, it will counter the overwhelming urge to scratch.

Fight Fatigue
Long distance walkers, world travelers, and explorers look upon the lemon as a Godsend.
When fatigue sets in, they might suck lemon juice by piercing the top of the fruit with a straw, giving themselves a quick-acting medicine and a lovely refreshment.
Explorers also use lemon for protection against many infections of the tropics.
A small amount of lemon juice will quench thirst more effectively than many times the amount of water.
Experienced travelers declare that when they add lemon juice to ordinary drinking water, in various localities, it acts as an antiseptic and prevents illness due to allergy to different water supplies.
Lemon oil also seems to be able to stimulate brain activity so whenever you feel tired for no reason or are finding it hard to focus or concentrate, add 4 drops of lemon oil to a water-filled aromatherapy lamp. Alternatively, drink a glass of lemon water every few hours.

Jun 17, 2009

Bundles of CURIOSITY, Energy & Laughter



Daddy is right here...wrestling Xavier...Look Xavier WON!









Enjoy the moment...(s)...Only One Chance to LIVE...
DO IT TODAY!

Jun 14, 2009

5...Quick Way to Calm Down


Find Some Water
While watching Disney's "Pocahontas" the other day with my daughter Katherine (yes, I do get some of my best insights from cartoons), I observed the sheer joy the main character shows upon paddling down the river, singing about how she is one with the water.
It reminded me of how universal the mood effects of water are, and how healing.
On the rainy or snowy days that I can't walk the double stroller over to our local creeks, I do something the global-warming guys say not to;
take a long shower,
imagining that I am in the middle of a beautiful Hawaiian rain forest.
"Water helps in many ways,"
writes Elaine Aron.
"When overaroused, keep drinking it--a big glass of it once an hour.
Walk beside some water, look at it, listen to it.
Get into some if you can, for a bath or a swim.
Hot tubs and hot springs are popular for good reasons."
Water is very THERAPUTIC...I ACTUALLY CANNOT MOVE IN THE MORNINGS until I've had a shower...seriously...Water actives me!

Jun 12, 2009

4...Quick Way to Calm Down


Go Outside
This is a true lifesaver for me.
I need to be outside for at least an hour every day to get my sanity fix.
Granted, I'm extremely lucky to be able to do so as a stay-at-home mom.
But I think I would somehow work it into my schedule even if I had to commute into the city every day.
Even if I'm not walking or running or biking or swimming, being outside calms me in a way that hardly anything else can.
With an hour of nature, I go from being a bossy, opinionated, angry, cynical, uptight person into a bossy, opinionated, cynical, relaxed person.
And that makes the difference between having friends and a husband to have dinner with and a world that tells me to go eat a frozen dinner by myself because they don't want to catch whatever grumpy bug I have.

Jun 11, 2009

3...Quick Way to Calm Down

Find Some Solitude
This can be challenging if you are at work, or at home with kids as creative and energetic as mine.
But we all need some private time to let the nervous system regenerate.
I must have known this back in college, because I opted for a tiny single room (a nun's closet, quite literally), rather than going in on a larger room with a closet big enough to store my sweaters. When three of my good friends begged me to go in with them on a killer quad, I told them, "Nope. Can't do it.
Need my alone time, or else none of you would want to be around me.
Trust me."My senior year I went to the extent of pasting black construction paper on the window above my door so no one would know if I was there, in order to get the hours of solitude that I needed.
Be creative.
Find your space.
Any way you can.
Even it involves black construction paper.

Jun 10, 2009

2...Quick Way to Calm Down

Close Your Eyes
Gently let the world disappear, and go within to regain your equilibrium.
Ever since my mom came down with blepharospasm (a neurological tick of the eyelid), I've become aware of how important shutting our eyes is to the health of the nervous system. The only treatment available for this disorder is to have surgery that permanently keeps your eyelids open (you need to moisten them with drops, etc.).
Such a condition would be living hell for my mom, because in closing her eyes she regains her balance and proper focus.
The only time I recommend not using this technique is on the road (if you're driving).

Jun 9, 2009

1...Quick Ways to Calm Down

Anxiety zappers that can rescue you from daily stresses By Therese J. Borchard
I'm easily overwhelmed.
When my kids' exuberant screams reach a decibel level my ears can't tolerate, when Chuck E., the life-size "rat" at the pizza place, starts doing his jig while flashing arcade lights blind me, or when I open my email to find 100 messages--


I feel a meltdown coming on.
Which is why I came up with seven quick ways to calm myself down.
I turn to these when I don't have time to call my mom and hear her tell me, "Everything is going to be fine."
They keep me centered and grounded for as long as possible, and they help me relax my body even during those times when screaming kids and dancing life-size rats converge.
Get the first calming tip.


1. Walk Away
Know your triggers.
If a conversation about global warming, consumerism, or the trash crisis in the U.S. is overwhelming you, simply excuse yourself.
If you're noise-sensitive and the scene at Toys-R-Us makes you want to throw whistling Elmo and his buddies across the store, tell your kids you need a time-out.
(Bring along your husband or a friend so you can leave them safely, if need be.)
My great-aunt Gigi knew her trigger points, and if a conversation or setting was getting close to them, she simply put one foot in front of another, and departed.

Jun 5, 2009

Smile!


Abe Lincoln said,
"People are about as happy as they decide to be."
~happiness is an INSIDE JOB!~

May 20, 2009

Grow!


The GROW Model
Coaching team members to improve performance
One key role of any leader is to coach team members to achieve their best.

As "coach", you will typically help your team members to solve problems, make better decisions, learn new skills or otherwise progress in their role or career.
Whilst some leaders are fortunate enough to get formal training as coaches, many are not.

They have to develop coaching skills for themselves.
Now this may sound daunting.
But if you arm yourself with some of proven techniques, find opportunities to practice and learn to trust your instincts, you can become a better coach, and so enhance your team's performance.
One proven approach that helps with this it the GROW model.
GROW is an acronym standing for
Goal -
Current Reality -
Options -
Will.
The model is a simple yet powerful framework for structuring a coaching session.
A useful metaphor for the GROW model is the plan you might make for an important journey. First, you start with a the map:
With this, you help your team member decide where they are going (their Goal) and establish where they currently are (their Current Reality).
Then you explore various ways (the Options) of making the journey.
In the final step, establishing the Will,
you ensure your team member is committed to making the journey and is prepared for the conditions and obstacles they may meet on their way.
Tip 1: Know Your Own RoleIn its traditional application, the GROW model assumes that the coach is not an expert in the "client's" situation, and therefore must act as an objective facilitator, helping the client select the best options and not offering advice or direction.
However, when a leader coaches his or her team members, other dynamics are in play:
As a leader you will usually have some expert knowledge to offer (see our article on expert power.)
Also, it's your job to guide the selection of options which are best for your organization, and veto options that are harmful.
How to Use the Tool:
Use the following steps to structure a coaching session:
Establish the Goal:
First, with your team member, you must define and agree the goal or outcome to be achieved. You should help your team member define a goal that is specific, measurable and realistic.
In doing this, it is useful to ask questions like:
"How will you know that you have achieved that goal?"

"How will you know the problem is solved?"
Examine Current Reality:
Next, ask your team member to describe their Current Reality.
This is a very important step:
Too often, people try to solve a problem without fully considering their starting point, and often they are missing some of the information they need to solve the problem effectively.
As the team member tells you about his or her Current Reality,
the solution may start to emerge.
Useful coaching questions include:
"What is happening now?"
"What, who, when, how often"
"What is the effect or result of that?"
Explore the Options:
Once you and your team member have explored the Current Reality, it's time to explore what is possible - meaning, all the many possible options you have for solving the problem.
Help your team member generate as many good options as possible, and discuss these. By all means, offer your own suggestions.
But let your team member offer his or hers first, and let him or her do most of the talking. Typical questions used to establish the options are:
"What else could you do?"
"What if this or that constraint were removed?
"What are the benefits and downsides of each option?"
"What factors will you use to weigh up the options?
Establish the Will:
By examining Current Reality and exploring the Options, your team member will now have a good idea of how he or she can achieve their Goal.
That's great - but in itself, this may not be enough!
So your final step as coach is to get you team member to commit to specific action. In so doing, you will help the team member establish his or her will and motivation.
Useful questions:
"So what will you do now . and when?
"What could stop you moving forward?"
"And how will you overcome it?"
"Will this address your goal?"
"How likely is this option to succeed?"
"What else will you do?"
Tip 2:
Practice by Coaching YourselfA great way to practice using the model is to address your own challenges and issues.
When you are 'stuck' with something, you can use the technique to coach yourself.
By practicing on your own challenges and issues, you will learn how to ask the most helpful questions.
Write down some stock questions as prompts for future coaching sessions.
Tip 3:
Ask Great Questions.
and Listen Well
The two most important skills for a coach are the ability to ask good questions, and effective listening.
Don't ask closed questions:
"Did that cause a problem?"
Do ask open ones:
"What affect did that have?
" Be prepared with a list of questions to for each stage of the G-R-O-W process.
Listen well and let your "client" do most of the talking.
Remember that silence is valuable thinking time:
You don't always have to fill silence with WORDS

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Live a balanced life - learn some & think some & draw

& PaInT & sInG & DaNcE & PlAy & WoRk every day some.

You & i... walking with me all this time

Prov. 31:17 She sets about her work vigorously

Prov. 31:17 She sets about her work vigorously

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